"Grouchy's Wedding Blues"

"Now that we've been smurfing each other for a few years, I was wondering if we could start smurfing together in the same house," Grouchy said.

"You mean you want to be married, don't you?" Broccoli asked.

"Who says that I want to be married? I just wanted us to start smurfing together in the same house first," Grouchy said.

"Now hold on there, Grouchy," Broccoli said. "If we're going to start smurfing together in the same house, we're going to have to smurf the knot sometime soon."

"But I hate weddings," Grouchy said.

"I hate them too, but you're not going to have me smurfing with you unless we smurf that part taken care of," Broccoli said. "Look, why don't we just ask Papa Smurf if we could smurf a private wedding ceremony with just him and a few other Smurfs as our witnesses?"

"A private wedding," Grouchy said to himself as he thought over what Broccoli was suggesting. "Well, a private wedding is better than a public one. We don't have to ask our fellow Smurfs for a lot of preparation just so we can smurf together. But I'm not going to ask for this unless we both ask Papa Smurf together."

"Whatever it takes, if it means that we're going to smurf through with this," Broccoli said with a slight smile.

And so the following day, Grouchy and Broccoli went to ask Papa Smurf if they could have a private wedding ceremony with only a few Smurfs as witnesses.

"Hmmm, a private ceremony," Papa Smurf said, stroking his moustache. "Are you sure that this what the two of you want, that you don't want to have the village celebrate your happiness together?"

"Absosmurfly sure about it, Papa Smurf," Grouchy said.

"We're not going to marry unless we have it smurfed the way we both want it," Broccoli insisted.

"Well, it's your wedding ceremony, and I'd be smurfed to let it be anything that you don't want it to be," Papa Smurf said. "I'm sure that we could have only your closest friends as your witnesses so that it can be recorded in our books that you two will be a married couple."

"But who are we going to bring as witnesses to this wedding, Grouchy?" Broccoli asked.

"I already know Empath would want to be a witness, as well as Tapper and Duncan," Grouchy said. "Maybe we can smurf some of your friends to join us."

"I'm sure my sister Smurfettes won't like being smurfed out of this one bit, Grouchy, but that part isn't going to be my problem or yours, if Mother Smurfette has anything to smurf about it," Broccoli said.

Empath, Tapper, and Duncan heard from Grouchy what kind of wedding he and Broccoli wanted, as did their wives Smurfette, Siobhan, and Brenda.

"Great Smurfiny Crickets, my dear Grouchy, you would not want your fellow Smurfs and Smurfettes to share in the happy moment, to smurf you and your bride their blessings for a smurfy union?" Tapper asked.

"This is the kind of wedding that I and Broccoli want for ourselves, Tapper," Grouchy said. "I thought that you would be happy for me."

"We are both happy for you, laddie," Duncan said. "It's just that you would only have your best friends smurf the privilege of seeing you and Broccoli smurf the knot, and not the entire village which has been your family."

"As far as I smurf it, you're the only real family that I ever had smurfed over the years," Grouchy said. "The other Smurfs...well, I can't say that the past years smurfing with them has been the best."

"This smurf seems to understand how you feel, Grouchy," Empath said. "This smurf would be honored to be one of your chosen witnesses to your private wedding."

"If only you didn't have to smurf that kind of wedding for yourself and Broccoli, Grouchy," Smurfette said. "I just want to see you be happy with the Smurfette you're going to marry, that's all."

"I'm still jealous that Empath out of all the Smurfs here got to marry you, Smurfette," Grouchy said. "But you know me...I'm never much for words other than saying 'I hate this and that' most of the time."

"Well, if this lucky Smurf is going to marry Broccoli, he's going to need a good suit to smurf before the minister in, isn't he?" Brenda said.

"If Grouchy doesn't want to make a big smurf of his wedding, I'd say we let him and his bride-to-be smurf the clothes that they want to be married in," Siobhan said.

"I couldn't agree with you more on that, my dear Siobhan," Tapper said. "Whatever you and Broccoli need, Grouchy, don't hesitate to ask your fellow Smurfs. We'll make sure that this wedding won't smurf too out of hand with preparations."

"Thanks, Tapper, because I hate too much preparations for a wedding," Grouchy said.

Meanwhile, Broccoli was having a talk with Mother Smurfette about her marrying Grouchy in a private wedding ceremony held by Papa Smurf.

"My child, I'm proud of you for your finding the right Smurf to marry, but you just want your best friend Smurfettes to attend this wedding?" Mother Smurfette asked.

"That's right, Mother," Broccoli said. "Me and Grouchy don't need a really big wedding, and we really don't need to smurf all the other Smurfs and Smurfettes together to have one. Is there a problem with that?"

"Of course not, Broccoli," Mother Smurfette said. "It's just that we've been so used to smurfing things together as a family that it smurfs off as a big surprise that we're not going to celebrate it together."

"Look, you want to celebrate me and Grouchy getting married, you can smurf a party for yourselves, but we just don't want to smurf a part of it, okay?" Broccoli said.

"You don't have to smurf so testy with me about your wedding, Broccoli," Mother Smurfette said. "I'll let the other Smurfettes know that you don't want anyone but your closest friends to smurf a part in this wedding. I can only wish for you and Grouchy to be smurfy together as a married couple, and for you to know that your home in our village will always be your home if you two decide to smurf your home here."

"If it makes you feel better, you've always been the best Mama Smurf that I ever had," Broccoli said as she gave Mother Smurfette a hug.

The day of Grouchy and Broccoli's wedding came. It was held inside the Smurf Village dining hall with Papa Smurf dressed as the minister. Grouchy was dressed in a tuxedo while Broccoli wore a beautiful dress made by Tailor's wife -- which made the both of them feel rather uncomfortable dressing up in, but did so just out of having some formality to go with their private wedding. Empath stood with his wife Smurfette and their daughter Psycheliana as witnesses along with Tapper and his wife Siobhan and Duncan with his wife Brenda. Tapper brought his harp and Duncan the uilleann pipes (since his bagpipes were too loud to use in an enclosed room) to play a wedding march with to set the proper mood as the Smurfs present got themselves ready for the ceremony. Outside the dining hall, Hefty was called to keep order in the village and to keep others from crashing the wedding with Tuffy standing at the doors as the bouncer.

"My little Smurfs, as both your Papa Smurf and the leader of this village," Papa Smurf began, "it smurfs me great pleasure to smurf the long-awaited privilege of smurfing these two fine Smurfs together in the bonds of smurfy matrimony. As it was smurfed in the beginning, so shall it smurf by the decree of nature, that male and female shall be smurfed together as one so that they may be fruitful with the blessings of love and family. I know how eager the both of you are in wanting to smurf eternity with each other. However, if there is any Smurf who feels that these two should not be smurfed together in marriage, please smurf now or forever hold your smurf!"

The room was rather silent for a moment, as none of the Smurfs being witnesses made any objections.

"If there are no objections, then let us proceed," Papa Smurf said. "Grouchy Smurf, do you take Broccoli Smurfette to be your smurfully-wedded wife, to cherish, honor, and obey, in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, for better and for worse, to love her as long as you both shall smurf?"

"I do, Papa Smurf," Grouchy said.

"And Broccoli Smurfette, do you take Grouchy Smurf to be your smurfully-wedded husband, to cherish, honor, and obey, in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, for better and for worse, to love him as long as you both shall smurf?"

"I do, Papa Smurf," Broccoli said.

Papa Smurf then called forth Empath. He raised up the pillow which contained the rings that Smithy Smurf has forged for them. "These rings made of gold will show that the two of you are insmurfably bound to each other for all time. You will smurf your own vows and in turn smurf the ring on the other's finger."

Grouchy was the first to take the ring. "Broccoli, I just want you to know that you're the only Smurfette who really knows what it's like to be me. It wasn't easy for me to love you for that, but you smurfed me that it was okay for me to be the Smurf that I am with you." He then placed the ring on Broccoli's finger. "With this ring, I vow that, from the smurfs of my own soul, to be the kind of Smurf that you want me to be, to smurf you everything that your heart desires no matter the cost, to make you the one and only Smurf that I will always love above all others."

Broccoli took the second ring. "Grouchy, I just want to say that it wasn't easy smurfing to know you at first, but over the years you made me a happier Smurfette, and I will not regret those moments we smurfed together." She then placed the ring on Grouchy's finger. "With this ring, I vow that, from everything that I smurf within me, I will be the Smurfette that you want me to be...to smurf you a home and a family that will always love you, and to have you as the one and only Smurf that I will always smurf above all others."

"Then, by the powers smurfed in me by Mother Nature and Father Time, whom I know in my spirit that they smurf before us as witnesses, and by all the Smurfs who have smurfed throughout the ages, I shall pronounce that Grouchy Smurf and Broccoli Smurfette are now husband and wife," Papa Smurf said. "May this bond between them smurf for all time!"

"Hurray!" all the Smurfs serving as witnesses shouted together.

"And now you may kiss the bride," Papa Smurf said to Grouchy.

"If you don't mind, Papa Smurf, we'd rather wait until we're alone together to smurf our first kiss," Broccoli said as she and Grouchy held each other's hands.

"Oh, of course, Broccoli," Papa Smurf said with a chuckle.

Afterward, Tapper took the couple and their friends into his tavern for a brief celebration. "For the newlyweds and for the future that they will share together," Tapper said as he poured champagne into everyone's glass, with Grouchy and Broccoli getting the first glasses.

"May they find their happiness together and may their house be smurfed with little ones," Brenda said as she raised her glass.

"I will drink to that, my sweet Brenda," Duncan said, also raising his glass.

Grouchy and Broccoli raised their glasses with the others and then drank together. "I love this champagne," Grouchy said after his sip.

"Ah, it could be better, but why would we need to complain about that?" Broccoli said.

"You'll find something worth complaining about, trust me," Grouchy said.

"The evening is young, my fellow Smurfs," Siobhan said. "I think we could liven things up a bit and let the couple smurf their first dance together."

"As long as it's just you Smurfs in here with us," Grouchy said. "What do you say, Broccoli? You want to share a first dance with me?"

Broccoli shrugged. "If it's going to make the others happy when it's just them in here with us. You know the song that we want to dance to, don't you?"

"Whenever you're ready, laddie," Duncan said to Tapper as they picked up their instruments and played a song that was Grouchy's and Broccoli's favorite song to sing together. As the couple danced, Grouchy sang:

I know it's late, I know you're weary.

I know your plans don't include me.

Still here we are, the both of us lonely,

Longing for shelter from all that we see.

Why should we worry? No one will care, girl.

Look at the stars now, so far away.

We've got tonight; who needs tomorrow?

We've got tonight, babe; why don't you stay?

Then Broccoli joined in.

Deep in my soul, I've been so lonely.

All of my hopes fading away.

I long for love like everyone else does.

I know I'll keep searching, even after today.

So there it is, dear, we've got it all now.

And here we are, babe; what do you say?

We've got tonight; who needs tomorrow?

We've got tonight, babe; why don't you stay?

"I know it's late, I know you're weary," Grouchy sang. "I know your plans don't include me."

"Still here we are...the both of us lonely...the both of us lonely," Broccoli sang.

"We've got tonight; who needs tomorrow?" Grouchy sang.

"Let's make it last, let's find a way," Broccoli sang.

"Turn out the lights, come take my hand now," Grouchy sang.

"We've got tonight, babe...why don't we stay?" they both sang together as the song closed.

After their celebration, Grouchy took Broccoli back home to his own house and carried her in over the threshold through the door.

"Well, that wasn't so painful for us to smurf through, was it?" Broccoli asked.

"As long as we don't have to smurf through it again, I'm completely smurfy with it," Grouchy said. "So what do you want to smurf now that we're married?"

"First off, I want to smurf out of these clothes and smurf back into our regular clothes so we can smurf into the forest together like we usually do," Broccoli said.

"Sounds smurfy to me," Grouchy said. "I hate wearing wedding clothes."

And so after the two Smurfs changed their clothes, Grouchy and Broccoli went walking off together holding hands until they reached the waterfalls, where they sat together staring at the water coming down over the falls. It was during their sitting together that Grouchy and Broccoli leaned over toward each other and kissed.

"So was that kiss good for you, Grouchy?" Broccoli asked gently.

"What about the next kiss?" Grouchy responded.

"What do you mean, the next kiss?" Broccoli began to ask, until she was interrupted by Grouchy kissing her on the mouth.

"You mean that you don't want me to smurf you anymore kisses?" Grouchy asked after the second kiss.

"I'll smurf you something more than just a kiss, Grouchy," Broccoli said as she leaned closer to Grouchy and slipped her hand underneath his hat.

"You want to smurf that in public, where we might be seen?" Grouchy said as he felt the tingling sensation of being aroused by Broccoli touching his bald head.

"Don't worry about the other Smurfs right now," Broccoli said as she continued to run her hand underneath his hat with her other hand soon joining and the two of them kissing each other.

Grouchy paid no attention to anything else, not even his hat falling off his head, as he ran his own hands underneath Broccoli's hat and continued kissing her until her hat fell off her head.

While this was going on, Empath and Smurfette went down to the waterfalls with their daughter Psycheliana and saw Grouchy and Broccoli enjoying themselves intimately with each other. "Oh my smurfness!" Smurfette gasped.

Empath smiled as he watched the couple. "This smurf believes that Grouchy and Broccoli are truly happy with each other and senses that they don't want their private moment to be disturbed, Smurfette," he said.

"I understand, Empath," Smurfette said before the two of them walked off in another direction.

The next morning, Grouchy and Broccoli woke up together in Grouchy's house, feeling completely refreshed and in need of a smoke. Grouchy offered one of his to Broccoli and used a smurfomatic lighter to ignite both his cigarette and Broccoli's.

"Well, Grouchy, I didn't think a Smurf like you would be so passionate like you were with me last night," Broccoli said as she drew a puff from her cigarette and then exhaled.

"Who can sleep when we're doing all that smurfing together?" Grouchy said. "I just hope we weren't dissmurfing anybody else in the neighborhood...not that it couldn't use a little noise now and then, if you know what I mean."

Broccoli snickered. "Let them complain about the noise level. I don't mind keeping the other Smurfs awake if that's going to be how it is with you."

"So, are we going to be settling down in this village or smurfing over to yours now that we're married?" Grouchy asked.

"You want to smurf over to my village?" Broccoli said. "I had enough of smurfing with the other Smurfettes in my smurf of the woods that I wouldn't mind a change in address right now."

"So nobody in your village is going to miss you?" Grouchy said. "Great! That means more of you for me!"

"Sympathy might miss me, but she's already smurfing with that Polaris Psyche," Broccoli said. "I don't know what that girl even smurfs in somebody like him."

"If she can make him feel like the way we feel right now, then what's the harm in those two smurfing together?" Grouchy said. "Matter of fact, he could use a good smurfing under the old hat if he even wore one."

"So are we smurfing out for breakfast or we going to wait for lunch?" Broccoli asked.

"You know what I'm hungry for...a little bit more Broccoli," Grouchy said with a suggestive chuckle.

Around lunchtime, the Smurfs were busy discussing among themselves about Grouchy and Broccoli's private little wedding that they weren't invited to when the couple finally showed up, looking like they could use something to eat.

"Well, well, if it isn't the newlywed couple enjoying their first day together," Greedy said as they approached the serving counter. "I hope you don't mind that I had to smurf your breakfast since neither of you showed up, but the lunch is pretty smurfy today. Anyway, you seem happier than you were before you got married."

"We're happy for right now, aren't we, Broccoli?" Grouchy said, looking into his wife's eyes as he picked up his meal.

"Maybe we should smurf ourselves a picnic so we can enjoy ourselves and a good meal away from the other Smurfs," Broccoli said.

"That doesn't sound like a bad idea there," Grouchy said. "Say, Greedy, you think you can smurf up a picnic basket for the two of us sometime soon?"

"You want a picnic, all you have to do is smurf when, and I can smurf you and your wife up a meal in no time," Greedy said.

"Just make sure you don't get too hungry and smurf up what you're smurfing up for the picnic basket," Grouchy warned him as he and Broccoli took their meals to the table where Empath, Tapper, and Duncan were sitting with their wives.

"So how did you enjoy your first night of marital bliss, Grouchy?" Empath asked.

"Oh, it was all right, though we couldn't keep our smurfs off each other, you know," Grouchy said.

"You don't have to smurf us all the details, my dear Grouchy, as long as the two of you enjoy the blessing that has been smurfed unto you through the privilege of marriage," Tapper said.

"I see that Broccoli is rather pleased with her new husband, which makes me feel a bit smurfy to know that the marriage is smurfing to a wonderful start," Siobhan commented.

"Just get ready for the rough smurfs ahead of you, boy," Duncan said. "Being married isn't going to be a bed of roses all the time when you've got a wife to smurf care of now."

"That's certainly being encouraging to the young pup and his lassie, my love," Brenda chastised.

"Oh, just let the two Smurfs enjoy themselves before they really need to worry about the other things that smurf on in marriages," Smurfette said.

"Well, how long do you think they're going to smurf this happiness before things start smurfing downhill for either of them?" Duncan asked.

"Smurfette is right, my fellow Duncan," Tapper said. "I think we should not make them worry about things that are yet to happen in their marriage, even if they start bickering like Selwyn and Tallulah."

"At least we don't have to worry about things smurfing around inside Grouchy's house since neither he or Broccoli have any magic powers," Empath said.

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