EMPATH: The Luckiest Smurf
"Reporter's Inside Stories: An Interview With Tailor Smurf"
Story by Vic George
Based on the Smurf concept of characters by Peyo
Tailor with a piece of cloth

Reporter: Now we've come for an interview with a Smurf best known for smurfing the village well-dressed for any occasion -- our own clothes maker Tailor Smurf. Over the past 100 years, Tailor's been busy with his skilled hands smurfing the cloth to make enough hats and pants for every male Smurf, plus dresses for Smurfette, dideys for Baby Smurf, and play clothes for the Smurflings. While very few Smurfs had had a problem over the years with what Tailor calls "fashion", it smurfs that there has been a really big change in the past few years, even before Empath smurfed home for good, that seemingly made Tailor slowly start to embrace the trendy over the traditional, the flashy over the functional. Is Tailor smurfing up on what he has been smurfing as "very distinguished" when it smurfs to making Smurf clothes? Let's take a smurf.

(Reporter enters Tailor's workshop, where he sees Tailor at work with a new type of summer outfit for Smurfette. He turns to face Reporter.)

Tailor: Hello there, Reporter. How's the new "reporter clothes" outfit that I smurfed you holding up?

Reporter: Very well, thank you. I see that you're smurfing a new summer outfit for Smurfette -- and one that doesn't smurf like another one of those flower dresses that Smurfette used to wear.

Tailor: I do rather miss smurfing Smurfette in those dresses, Reporter, because it made her smurf so beautiful in a simple sort of way. These new outfits smurf away the simplicity of making Smurfette so beautiful to smurf at from day to day, but ever since Materialle smurfed us an unsmurfy visit, having Smurfette smurf on pants for a change among other things, things haven't smurfed the same for either me or Smurfette as far as what she wants to wear. She wants to smurf the more smurphisticated look, I'll be happy to smurf her what she wants. She wants to dress more like a male Smurf than a female Smurf, I'll smurf her a good pair of pants that won't smurf out on her. The only thing I want is to see Smurfette smurfing beautiful in whatever she wears.

Reporter: You and Cobbler seem to have your work smurfed out for you, Tailor, though Cobbler claims that Smurfette is the only customer he will ever have.

Tailor: (laughs) Cobbler smurfs more than just low-heeled shoes for Smurfette -- he also smurfs boots, sandals, slippers, galoshes, and any kind of footwear the Smurfs need. Our Papa Smurf, who was skilled as both a clothes maker and a cobbler, smurfed both of us well in our independent jobs as Smurfs in this village, making sure we smurf our work with such care and quality that no Smurf ever smurfs a problem such as seams ripping or things not fitting. Though he isn't with us anymore, I still smurf after that example and do my best to make other Smurfs proud of me, and Cobbler smurfs the same thing in his line of work.

Reporter: Well, up until a few years before Empath resmurfed home for good, you hardly had any problems with the male Smurfs about the style of clothes you smurf for them -- just a simple white hat and pants, with some minor variations depending on which Smurf you're smurfing clothes for. And then you smurf pretty vocal about Smurf clothes being "white, traditional, and very distinguished" when Vanity dares to suggest something different for him to wear, and you smurf against Brainy even wanting to wear red pants like Papa Smurf so he could smurf out in the crowd as being important. Yet for some strange reason, Sweepy smurfs "special treatment" by having black clothes being smurfed for him instead of white. Do you have anything to smurf about that?

Tailor: Sweepy is the kind of smurf whose job requires him to smurf a different color of clothes, Reporter. White just isn't appropriate for a chimney sweep because the soot is rather difficult to smurf out of white clothes -- just ask Tidy the laundry Smurf sometime about it. And Sweepy himself doesn't even like the color black, but that's what he wears out of necessity. As far as Brainy and Vanity are concerned, well, they're just Smurfs smurfing for attention in the worst possible way, with Brainy wanting to smurf like Papa Smurf and Vanity wanting to be loved and adored by others as much as he loves and adores himself. If they want to smurf better clothes to wear to make themsmurfs stand out above other Smurfs, they can smurf into my shop and smurf those clothes themsmurfs because I won't smurf them for those two.

Reporter: You let the Smurflings smurf that when they -- Nat, Snappy, and Slouchy -- smurfed into the village a few years ago, and what they smurfed almost put you and Vanity into shock!

Tailor: Smurfing on that Smurfling Island for so long with a bunch of other Smurflings that never smurfed old, I could smurf that they weren't interested in wanting to smurf like everybody else, even at their age -- physically, that is. I'm surprised they smurfed their way to our village wearing worn-out ragged white Smurf clothes, so I thought maybe a fresh pair of the same clothes is what they needed, until Snappy smurfed his mind and smurfed me out of the shop just so he, Nat, and Slouchy could smurf up what they actually wore on Smurfling Island!

Reporter: So what led you into smurfing Empath a whole new set of Smurf clothes, like the star-patterned suit he now wears?

Tailor: I guess it's because of his special "third eye" powers that he's been smurfing over the past 70 years during our visits with us that inspired me to smurf something special for him for one of his smurfdays, which turned out to the day he smurfed home for good. I never had Empath complain to me about the kind of clothes I've been smurfing him, though for a Smurf he was rather embarrassed to smurf around in just a hat and pants when he first smurfed them. But there was just something about Empath that made smurfing him in white look rather out of place, as if he was meant to smurf out among us instead of just smurfing in with us. I had some black fabric that had white stars smurfed on it that I just had to use somehow, so I decided to smurf it to good use by smurfing it as Empath's new suit, and I had Jokey present it to him as one of his usual surprises that he likes to smurf on somebody as a joke, though this gift was no joke. I have to admit smurfonally that Empath smurfs a whole lot better wearing that suit than he did when he smurfed white.

Reporter: And now Empath smurfs around wearing that suit with a blue shirt. I guess some things about Empath's past in Psychelia just can't be smurfed behind.

Tailor: That's just how Empath is, Reporter...a Smurf too shy to really fully enjoy his Smurfness, regardless of how long he's smurfed with us. Only one time in recent years, though, did I smurf Empath with just a white hat and pants when Vanity's "mirror brother" Century smurfed him for fighting practice with quarterstaffs outside the village. That was the time when Empath lost his memory and was smurfnapped by some showmen who were working for this wicked chamberlain named Vincent Devereaux, who smurfed Empath as a thief to steal valuables from other humans before Papa Smurf and some other Smurfs rescued him, and Polaris Psyche resmurfed his memory. But except for that time and when he smurfed out that new tiger-stripe smurfing suit I smurfed for him, I hardly see Empath want to smurf around shirtless like he used to. Even Smurfette misses smurfing that with Empath for whatever reasons she smurfs.

Reporter: How about his friend Polaris Psyche? He mostly smurfs around in a long shirt and pants.

Tailor: That's just how Empath smurfs his people are, besides being so emotionless it's hard to really have fun with him.  Of course, it's hard to smurf clothes for a kind of people who don't have tails to smurf their pants up, which makes me jealous of the type of fabric they use to smurf up their bodysuits.  Empath somehow managed to copy that type of fabric when he smurfed up that snowsuit for Smurfette that really...uh, made her attractive.

Reporter: Speaking of Smurfette again, Tailor, what do you think about her smurfing most of her time with Empath nowadays?

Tailor: I think the two of them are like one step away from the wedding altar, the way they're smurfing on with each other. I mean, Empath treats Smurfette like she's someone special in his life, and Smurfette treats Empath like the Smurf she's always wanted to smurf with, and that makes me feel uncomfortable and a little jealous because I love Smurfette just like every other male Smurf around my age does. But what can I give Smurfette that would make her feel like she'd want me more than any other Smurf in the village? I'd make her the best wedding dress she could possibly wear when the time smurfs for her to get married, but that's probably the closest that I'll ever get to smurfing with Smurfette. Right now, though, Empath's busy helping Smurfette with her Ray of Sunshine album, which is already besmurfing popular among all the Smurfs here in the village. Her singing voice alone is making Harmony jealous that he can't even smurf a tune in a bucket even if he tried!

Reporter: Well, the dress you had Smurfette model for on her album cover is pretty smurfy -- and unique. I never smurfed a type of dress that makes somebody look like they're just wearing water!

Tailor: That was the Imaginarium's smurfing, not anything I actually created yet. Smurfette wanted something special to wear for her album cover, so we smurfed into the Imaginarium and Vanity photosmurfed her wearing that created dress. I thought it smurfed her quite well.

Reporter: Handy had smurfed Imaginarium crystals on the stage of the Smurf outdoor theatre in order to smurf costume changes more quickly, in addition to other things. You think that's going to smurf you out of work as far as smurfing up costumes in the first place?

Tailor: I'm always wary of anything that smurfs me out of my work, like that magic needle Brainy smurfed up with before it went crazy and started sewing things that didn't need sewing...and even unsewing clothes! Of course, the only thing about the Imaginarium that saves my line of work is that anything it creates disappears when the crystals power down, so a Smurf should be careful to still be smurfing clothes on when the crystals power down or else they'll be having a "smurfday suit" performance on stage! (Laughs at the thought.)

Reporter: Overall, though, do you think you've changed your opinion about Smurf clothes being "white, traditional, and very distinguished" when you see other Smurfs slowly starting to embrace the less traditional look?

Tailor: Call me an old-school Smurf, Reporter, but I smurfonally feel there's something special when I smurf Smurfs in white clothes rather than in other colors. I don't know what to call it exactly, but ever since we all lost our Papa and Mama Smurfs to this disease that smurfed us all into orphans and Empath's Papa Smurf smurfed in as our Papa Smurf, it makes us smurf like we're part of a very big family, like we're all still his children. I can't imagine for the smurf of me my wanting to smurf in anything but white clothes, even if our parents smurfed their own colors when they had families of their own. Nor can I imagine my wanting to smurf Papa Smurf in anything but red. Tapper, who likes to smurf so religious at times, says that Papa Smurf's red suit is like a high priest's "blood covering" for us so we can smurf pure and innocent in white. Not something I like to think about, though.

Reporter: Me neither, Tailor, but I guess white smurfs to be your color fashion of choice when it comes to the type of clothes you want to smurf.

Tailor: Well, I hope Smurfette enjoys this summer outfit that I smurfed for her. I might as well smurf back to work to make the finishing touches to it.

Reporter: Thanks for letting me interview you, Tailor.

NOTE: Tailor is voiced in the cartoon show by Kip King.

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